Lizzie Deignan is multitasking hard.

More precisely, she’s breastfeeding her newborn daughter, Orla, while doing this Skype interview, which also explains why she smoothly rejected my request that it be a video call.

Understandable—and impressive. Deignan (known as Lizzie Armitstead until she married Irish pro cyclist Philip Deignan in 2016) hasn’t even been a mom for seven weeks, yet seems unfazed by the kind of priority juggling that stymies many new parents.

It’s not all that surprising given her long list of accolades, the likes of which take serious drive and focus to achieve. She’s the 2015 Road World Champion and won silver in the 2012 London Olympics road race, finishing barely a bike length behind winner Marianne Vos. She’s a four-time British National Champion, two-time UCI World Cup winner, and has topped the podium at many of cycling’s most storied races including the Tour of Flanders, Strade Bianche, and the Philadelphia Cycling Classic.

Having made headlines this summer as the first rider announced on the new Trek-Segafredo women’s team—when she was six months pregnant—she’s planning her 2019 season to peak for the World Championships in September, which will take place in Yorkshire where she grew up. And she feels fortunate to be part of a team that has encouraged her to craft her professional goals around her family priorities. “The fact that they approached me as a pregnant woman signaled that they were really on board with equality in the sport,” Deignan says. “It’s an exciting project.”

Between Orla’s muffled coos and occasional hungry whimpers, Deignan, who turns 30 this December, talked openly about how she’s managing the conflicting priorities of being a new parent and a world-class athlete, the one goal she’s still striving for, and why she’s proud to be a torch bearer for equality in cycling.

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How is being a mom so far?

Nothing can quite prepare you for it! It’s been pretty full-on, pretty overwhelming, but lovely as well. She’ll be six weeks on Sunday and I can’t believe that. The time’s just gone so fast.

It does go fast. What has been the biggest surprise?

Just how hard it is. I think every new parent tells you, “Oh, it’s going to be really difficult. You’re not going to have any time.” You’re like “Oh, yeah, I’ll be fine.” But I totally understand now that you’re all in from the moment she’s born.

Did you always want to have kids?

Yeah, always. I’ve always, always been very maternal. I think it’s probably because I was the youngest in my family, so I was always fascinated by babies, and I never got to be a big sister to anybody.

How many do you want?

Before Orla I wanted four. But the first thing I said to my husband was: “I’m never having another baby again!” Now I’ve already forgotten how painful labor was, and I definitely want more.

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And how was the labor and delivery?

Nothing can quite prepare you for that either. I had a normal, lucky, natural delivery and she just came very quickly, in like four hours, so I didn’t have a chance to get any painkillers. As soon as I was given the go-ahead to push, I was like, “Right, let’s go!” The pain was a challenge! I did it all on gas and air. My recovery afterwards was probably better because of that.

Were you conflicted at all before trying to get pregnant?

No, it was probably the only decision that I’ve ever made that was just based completely on emotion rather than what was logical, or sensible, or what I should do. I just had an instinct, that I wanted to start a family, and my husband was very much the same. You don’t know how lucky you’re going to be, and I didn’t want to risk it waiting too much longer to start trying.

How did your team at the time, Boels-Dolmans, react when you told them you were pregnant and planning to take some leave?

They were definitely surprised. It obviously wasn’t in their plan for that season that I would step out. It wasn’t ideal, obviously. They weren’t planning on me becoming a mom, and that was my decision.

When you were pregnant, how did it feel? Did it change the way you thought about your body?

Very much so. I’m a bit of a control freak, and it made me realize just how much of a control freak I am! You just have no control over it. I could sit there on a Monday and say, “Oh, this week I’ll try and do three or four hours on the bike,” or whatever. Then the next day I’d wake up, and I wouldn’t be able to move much further than the sofa. It was, I suppose, humbling in a way, that Mother Nature takes over. It’s a weird feeling. But I really enjoyed being pregnant.

Did you have morning sickness?

I did, yeah. The first 12 weeks were awful. Luckily, it’s distant memory, but I knew very, very quickly I was pregnant just because of how awful I felt.

Did you find anything helped?

Chips, salt, fat! I couldn’t look at vegetables. Even riding a bike helped. Just on the trainer. I’d do an hour a day and that kind of helped.

Were you able to ride every day?

Yeah, pretty much throughout my pregnancy. There would be the odd week or so where I would just feel like I hit a wall. I did have those weeks where I just didn’t exercise.

Did you have to change anything in terms of your bike fit?

I did toward the end. I put my handlebars up.

Yeah, I guess the belly is a factor there! What did you miss the most about your pre-pregnancy riding while you were pregnant?

Pushing myself, suffering. I still managed two- to three-hour rides right up until the 30th week of pregnancy, and then I kind of put it back to two hours, then one hour of riding, but just very, very gentle. I didn’t ever do any intervals or anything like that. I didn’t do any core stability because I was conscious of looking after my abdominal muscles. I didn’t want to take any risks.

What advice would you give other women about riding during pregnancy and then postpartum?

Just take it day by day while you’re pregnant. Listen to your body more than you ever have before. Generally, if you’re tired when you’re pregnant, there’s a reason for it. Eat plenty and just do what feels right for you because there’ll be a lot of people who would raise an eyebrow or say, “Oh, you shouldn’t be out on the road,” or whatever. But if you feel safe, then have the confidence to trust your instincts. Then postpartum I’d have to let you know because I’ve not started riding yet!

You haven’t?

No, I did try and ride a couple of weeks ago and I was really sore afterward, so I’ve decided to just do a little bit of running, just to be cautious because there’s no point risking it. I have an appointment with the doctor on Monday and I’m hoping they’ll give me the all clear. That would be six weeks that she was born.

What are your plans for balancing parenting with training?

With my husband there’s two of us who will take responsibility for the childcare. I think being a professional athlete, although there’s a lot of travel, et cetera, involved, I do think it’s quite a compatible job to have with being a mom. I’ll be out of the house three or four hours a day, and the rest of the time I can give to Orla.

If you and your husband both have to train at the same time will you have a babysitter?

We’ll have a babysitter, yeah, because my parents are in the UK and Philip’s parents are in Ireland, and we live in France.

Bike racing obviously has risks. Have you thought any differently about those risks now that you’re a parent, now that there’s someone who relies on you?

I don’t think I was ever somebody who took a lot of risk anyway, so I always had that perspective that it wasn’t worth it. No, I don’t think that’ll change. I’ll not be bombing down descents, but I never really did anyway.

Do you know yet what your first race back will be?

No, I’ve said the latest will be June that I’ll return to racing, so I may return earlier but I’m not sure. It depends on the team and how the girls are doing and where they need me.

Tell me about your goals for 2019. I know that you’re targeting Road World Championships in Yorkshire, then Olympics in 2020, but what about other goals?

Next year is just the World Championships because it’ll be a year that Orla’s been born then. If I’m serious about making that a goal I can’t really push myself earlier than that because I’ll trip myself up.

Are there any other cycling goals that you still want to accomplish?

Olympic gold.

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Deignan riding for her former team, Boels-Dolmans.

You’ve talked about in some previous interviews how it took some time for you to develop the confidence to ride as a leader. Do you still struggle with that?

No, I think it’s something that I’ve grown into and something that I really enjoy doing now. Self-doubt and lacking self-confidence is such a... When you’re looking at other riders and people in normal jobs, friends who hold themselves back from going on an interview or whatever, it’s such a shame and such a waste of so much talent. I have that perspective now that I wouldn’t want to do that again.

When I first had my daughter I felt like being a mom was the hardest job I’d ever had. Do you ever have doubts about your ability as a parent?

Yeah, I’m sure I will every day of my life. But at the same time, I’ve been surprised just how instinctive it is. Before she was born, I was kind of thinking, “Oh God, do we know what we’re doing?” You do have this incredible instinct about what’s right for them. I’m sure I’m going to be a worrier forever more now she’s here.

You’ve said that in terms of racing you were maybe going through the motions the last couple of years. Describe that, what do you think was going on?

I always desperately wanted to become World Champion and to win the Tour of Flanders, and I’ve done that. I’d had a bad experience with the Rio Olympics [finishing a disappointing fifth amid controversy over three missed drug tests] and just wondered why I was putting myself through it. The only reason I was doing it was because I was good at it and conscientious, but it’s no fun winning a race if you’re not even bothered that you won it. That sounds ridiculous to people that are desperate to win races. It sounds almost spoiled, and it was kind of becoming that way. I just wasn’t really that happy going to the same bike races, doing the same thing over, and over again.

Had you thought about retiring at that point?

Yeah, but I knew I wasn’t ready. I just knew something had to change.

Let’s talk about your relationship with Trek. When did you start talking to them? Walk me through the timeline.

I started speaking to them around the end of May, June and they’d approached me and said that they were thinking of doing a women’s team and what did I think. Obviously, I was really enthusiastic, and they’ve put together the team really quickly because of the infrastructure of the men’s team that they have.

What are you most excited about with the new team?

Just the change, just something new, just the freshness of it. Working with new women. A whole new group of people, I think. It’s just really motivating to have a change.

There’s a team camp coming up in December. Will you bring the baby?

It depends. I’m hoping to be able to express [breastmilk], so we’ll see. We’ll see how much milk I can get!

In terms of balancing parenthood and your career, you’ve said you are inspired by Serena Williams. Tell me about that, and is there anyone else who inspires you?

Yeah, I think as athletes we have to endure lots of other people’s—what’s the word—their ethos. It is a business at the end of the day, and you have to endorse whatever mindset or tag line the company that you’re working for is pushing, and that’s part of professional sport. But I’m a genuine feminist, and I believe in women trying to have it all. It’s a genuine motivation to succeed now, and somebody like Serena Williams is phenomenal and what she’s done is very inspiring.

You saw her at Wimbledon this year, right?

I did, yeah. That was crazy, to see her in real life, to see just how powerful she was, was amazing.

The Gear I Used While I Was Pregnant
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Bontrager Flare R Tail Light

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I always want to be safe whilst riding, but I took that even more seriously when I was pregnant. When I used this daytime running light, I felt that drivers respected me more.

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Wattbike Pro Indoor Trainer

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I used this power-based trainer when it wasn't safe to ride outside—too wet, or hot—and when I felt I might be too tired to commit to an outdoor ride.

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Trek Émonda Women's

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I started riding this bike when I was 6 months pregnant. I changed the position of my handlebars to accommodate my growing bump, and felt comfortable throughout.

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Santini Volo Bib Short

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The most comfortable shorts I've ever used. I used the same chamois throughout my pregnancy, although I went up two sizes in the shorts.

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Do you think that women in pro cycling are discouraged from having babies?

It’s a funny one because obviously heading into a season you have a team that’s managing budgets and setting up their team in the way that they need to win races, et cetera. But from my perspective, I didn’t feel that it was necessary to tell people that I was planning to start a family. I might have been unsuccessful or whatever. It was very much, for me, a very separate, personal decision. I think that should be everybody’s right really, every woman’s right to make that call.

It’s a difficult one as a professional athlete because for a lot of women in this game, they just financially can’t afford to do it. I’m in a lucky position. I could step away from earning a wage for a year. I don’t think it’s necessarily that women are discouraged. I just don’t think there’s been that many examples of it before in sport, in our sport anyway.

How do you want to be remembered?

I don’t know—that I challenged the status quo I suppose. Just [as a person] who wasn’t afraid to challenge the status quo and who did what she wanted.

Do you see yourself as a torch bearer? Do you feel like you have a responsibility in some way to show that managing motherhood and being a pro athlete can be done?

Yeah, it would definitely be a privilege if I were seen that way, if I do make a success of it. But more importantly, it’s for my daughter, for Orla really, that she grows up in a house where she doesn’t feel like she has to fit into any box, and she can do what she wants.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.